Flavor Rock

Ok so I took a little bit of artistic freedom with image association...

but tell me you don't see it?

It is my new favorite 2 hours of Celebreality. I have to admit, it is a hot mess and thus I am drawn to it. So much so that I have spent a little time analyzing this.

There are many similarities... how come the person that gets voted off is more about the girls' coup than the guy's original thought? I mean really... how come they sort of bum rush, scream and cackle... and that is how the decision is made. I mean really?

so by survival of the fittest you end up with that which is the most catty and manipulative. and how come all of these girls are nasty looking? or wanna be models with shots all over myspace with their bums exposed... like WOW.

No i will not post for reference. you can search it yourself. the links are somewhere on http://www.flavorofloveworld.com/ and http://www.vh1.com/shows/series/rock_of_love_2/splash.jhtml respectively.

I think though the girls on ROL II are more forth coming with being *ahem* adult entertainers... the girls on FOL III are pretty much looking like prostitutes.

Uh... I think Amber is going to win and I think Daisy will eat a cheeseburger. and Bret will continue to play with all of the girls from the show past and present... why? because this is season 2. and he can.

SoSaysI... so it must be true.

Moving on. Friday found me downtown w/Bunkles and friends. We meant to go to an outdoor concert... found favorite bar that had the Micheal Foster Project (excellent brass band, i've known the trumpeter since we were in middle school) and kind of forgot.

True to form Trip (with both sisters so his triplet status is confirmed) was there and squaking. He has no job. Oh. That is why he was "working" for alcohol a couple of weekends ago. Oh. Too bad Tourettes is at the beach and could not take her verbal revenge.

I am the woose that feels sorry. i will try to look at his resume and see what we can do.

Of course Bryan was there. I saw for 2 seconds... this is just old now. I didn't say anything and he didn't either. ugh. luckly the place was over packed and there was no awkwardness.

However... excellent sound byte of the night came in the form of a pick up line from random person...

"Excuse me, I just wanted to let you know that you ignite the deepest recesses of my heart"...

yes, i generally do. no he did not get my phone number.

i resent that.

Maybe there are still Brit fans out there... but I don't know any.

Further... that is my Alma Mater, Take it off Brit... I know you haven't heard that in a while, but take it off.


grrrr tigers.


p.s. I relay my Bryan story at the outing last night, and I love that I have friends who love me. So I tell Pretty Ricky and Christmas... both are laughing at me... They say the bit that keeps me dillusional... "If that was me, i would think it was funny. If he doesn't get your sense of humor then he is not for you. and why would you want someone who does not get it?"

in truth I still think it was funny too, even if it begot awkwardness.

...sounds about right.

let me tell you about yesterday.

I am again teaching for Junior Achievement... it works well for me on Thursdays... I get to work about 11.

The Sr. VP blah-blah has decided he wants a succession/development plan based upon what he had at his old company.

Ok cool.

He has several hundreds of pages of manuals focused on this plan.

cool still.

He has one hard copy that he wants us (M and I) to turn into a presentation by Tuesday... along w/the 2 other gi-normous bits he wants us to create for the same meeting.

oh good. i thougt this might be the slightest bit difficult. (please note the charming/refreshing use of sarcasm to illustrate one's frustration)

yay.

Short version: we spent all day on this.

I left work at 10 pm. i was beyone tired, it was a loooong work day.

To further moment of weakness, the Dream Killer casually calls to see if i've turned in my law school app. at almost 10 o'clock at night? c'mon!

... i mumble something about being at work and he makes all of the requisite "poor baby" noises. complete with the offer of wine.

to further the dumb-f******g of myself, he offers wine at the new Loft in Perkins Rowe. It is a spin off of the favorite Wine Loft... I have yet to see it, i am all about this. even if it is with him. after all... new trendy bar? right up his alley.

I meet him there, and walk right into... guess who?

Bryan. Attorney Bryan who is 30 years old from the post right under this one. Attorney Bryan who played me to the left because I offended him with my intro. He's looking right at me... I kind of waved and hurried to hide behind DK.

I have to laugh at this. And then I look around at all of the girls in the super tight, super short ill-fitting cocktail dresses that are all the rage... I am in a long sleeved button down and dress slacks. and having a run in that is a little awkward.

Yep. about par for the course and this sounds about right.

I could not see him tonight... as I have kick-ass super model hair and full battle make up. no, not today. yesterday. when i looked like i'd been beaten Rodney King style with the ugly stick.

ugh.

Not Everyone's Cup of Tea...

So that looks more like coffee... or Chai! For the sake of argument it is Chai. Was supposed to do a Heart Race benefit with Mommiey and Grams instead of Yoga this morning.. thankfully Grams punked out because it looks rainy and she does not trust the roads by the Lakes... she can cancel, but there was no way I was going to :)

So I have a few minutes before I have to leave for yoga.

This morning I am assessing the collateral damage of last night of last night. (not literally... just the kind of stuff we managed to take with us) Not too much... McDonald's bag, Vitamin Water bottle... Tourettes' managed to steal the jacket out of my Jeep that I expressly forbid her to take... and deleted a coupla phone numbers out of my phone.

I know something about myself... I freeze when someone asks for my number... in my head I am playing out what I think the 1st awkward conversation might sound like... retarded, i know.

Unless you are something special, you probably aren't gonna get it.

But I will politely take your number and really save it in my phone...

and delete it the next morning.

Because i know me. I've met me. I'm not going to call. I just wouldn't know what to say.

So the one of the numbers I am deleting is from a 'wing-man'... Oh YES! Last night there was an instance that I got played to the left. It is not so much a blow to the ego as it is kind of funny. At least I think it is... see if you do.

So at bar #1 I casually see cute guy. I think he sees me too. I play with my friends, Tourettes' gets antsy, we leave.

Bar #4, see him again

We sit outside and are amusing ourselves... I think he is cute. I am going to talk to him. I should mention at this point that I wonder how old he is. He looks like he could be young. But he is at a bar where they checked ID ... we all know this means nothing.

So I use this as my intro...

K: Hi. You are cute, how old are you.

Boy: I'm 30, what kind of question is that?

K: I just wanted to make sure.

Boy: you are cute, how old are you?

K: It doesn't matter because I'm cute.

Boy: My name is Bryan (real name because i do not have to protect those i will never see again)... Attorney Byran. What's your name

K: K.

more conversation... his friend makes fun of my Abita Strawberry Lager (as that is the seasonal Abita, in case you didn't know.. but how could you NOT?!)

Boy informs me he is going to "tell on me" to Tourettes who is sitting in the corner talking to people we know... i say "go ahead, she loves me, nothing you say will change that.

Boy: We'll see about that.

so he does. and I talk to his friend. Who is nice enough... but like i said, not my 1st choice. I'm not trawling here!

Boy is taking a while, I go over and try to make amends.Tourettes is annoyed with my Boy... and giving me the "THIS is what you thought was cute?!" look.. this in officially not going well.

I say: I think you misunderstood my intro...

he demurs that he is going to get a drink... and his friend stayed with us the rest of the night. Tourettes is confused and says so "what just happened and why are we stuck with this guy? The other one came over here and said that you said he was too old for you". NO! I was making sure he was not 17!

I have officially been played to the left. ouch! Maybe I will not use that intro ever again.

and yet... it was meant to be funny. but even I am ok with not being every body's cup of tea.

Here is the sad part... while i take his friend's number the friend is trying his best sincere pitch of "I would love to hang out with you, you are smart and funny... even as friends... blah blah"...

and I take the number knowing I will never call. But he does not know that. I hope he knows.

I hope one day I will actually use the numbers.

I just wouldn't know what to say.

Why are Gay Men, Straight Single Women's Most coveted accessory?

Sadly I think I may know the answer to this.

I think I could tell you in one word... I will save it until the end.

the phrase is because gay men have become 'yes' men to single straight women.

why do i say this? read on.

Tourette's got long-distance Austin-type dumped on Monday. The boyfriend is far away and wants her to give up her life as she knows it and marry him... and live in Bum F**K Egypt... because country girls have no life until they get married. Tourettes was presented with an ultimatum and said... "... thank you but no".

No worries. She has me. and I love her.

I love her enough that I do not want to see her hurt... if she is, i will do my part to make it better.

she started drinking at 5 this afternoon. i picked her up about 8, we make it downtown and hit the bars.

we come across Triplet, he has a fraternal twin... he says there is a triplett... it has yet to be confirmed...

Trip as we shall call him is flamingly homosexual. He is. If you know him, you know he is. We took a class together way back when (in early college...) he is the balm to a female's insecurities.

At Tsunami he runs over and GUSHES over how fabulous I look... how he is so jealous because I am the hottest thing there. He scoops me up and twirls me around and everyone is forced to look because he is having a FIT over how wonderful I am.

we were on our way out to another bar. Tourettes says he is not the Will to my Grace.. he is the JACK. I laughed... until we saw him 2 bars later... and she has been cornered by Old-I-have-money-guy-but-i-am-too-cheap-to-buy-you-a-$3-beer...but-please-sleep-with-me-anyway guy... and here comes Trip... to gush about how he knew I would be here because the ugly people were every where else, and if you don't hang out with the beautiful people, what is the point of being in public. I laugh, this is funny to me...

Tourette's decides he will be her new Project Runway guy... i.e. "fierce". they have a bonding moment, he talks her into buy him an $11 cosmo with Grey Goose because it is what I am drinking and more expensive than the beers Tourettes' consumes.

he leaves shortly after downing the drink. Tourettes is heart-broken.

She has never bought a drink for a straight guy... she has never had to.

But she felt kinship with Trip... and went out on a limb... and expected him to be charmed and stay put...

and the word of what such a type person provides... is Validation. it is nice to hear him gush. he does so in such public places... but such a person cannot be so for very long. i would love to say i am the hottest thing ever... and yet, even I know that he does it because it makes people stare... at him. tourettes wanted to sit next to someone who thinks she is hot, and not because they want to sleep with her.

i get it, i am sorry she took this harder than the boy breaking up with her... at least he sought to marry her. trip only wanted a drink.

newest avatar

this is my vicarious vacation. i am taking the turtle and the white tiger. and leaving the rest of you f******s here.

ok, you can come if you want.

that is about where my hair is... it's growing back, i need a trim... i am rambling and trying to make up for lots of neglect.

Could somebody wash my car, please?

The jeep needs to be washed. badly.

it now has volcanic dust on it. (all the better to lift finger prints with) and will require a pressured spray of water to get it off...

so these kids are having a fund raiser. You've seen these things... kids on the side of the street with signs... buckets to collect money... they wash your car, you give them whatever you have.

i see what i think is this and i am excited... as we have discussed, my jeep needs to be washed. badly.

so i pull over, here come the kids with the bucket. i drop in my coupla bucks... they say thank you, and run away.

wait.

what just happened? my jeep is failing to wash itself, and no one else is doing it?

WTF?

it was not THAT kind of fund raiser. It was more like just begging for funds. mutha f*******! These little punks these days don't know how good they have it! in my day, the dance team did not get to go to competitions unless we raised a certain amount of money... and one of the ways we did it was selling stuff, or providing services for said money! not just taking people's money!

in retrospect the sentence before last might look questionable, but you know what i mean.

ugh.

So back to laptop that was taken... filled out police report yesterday. My boss's boss got in town today and will be here through friday... m will tell him that he has to sign off on buying me a new laptop. not fired yet. we will see how this goes.

also, since the most recent dismissal of DK... i still need that freakin letter of rec for law school from his dad. he is picking it up and getting the privilege of dropping it off tomorrow. sticking to it this time. no him. no more. not good. wow, now if i only had a nickel for every time...

OMG I GOT JACKED!

and in the stupidest way ever!

so I am now sans work laptop... this is gonna be an interesting conversation tomorrow.

so in the course of this week... i have moved back and forth to work and home with laptop. i also have a desktop at work... so i didn't so much miss it when i slept about 4 hours a night.

i thought i left it at home...

at home i thought i left if at work.

this weekend as i start to try to get some work done and i need so post something on the intranet site.... i can't find it. i even went back to work on a freakin holiday.

Roommate pops up with "be careful, lock the doors, make sure your window is closed... 3 people have lost laptops out of their cars in the past couple of weeks".

CRAP.

so i get to enlighten m (boss) and fill out a police report...

i wonder if i will get fired for this. that would be unfortunate.

What the F*** do Kenyans eat?

Today was the Crescent City Classic. A 10K. My first 10K. My time was awful but at least I finished!

By the end my muscles were on fire because I nether trained enough nor stretched enough. I am having sinus issues... and I felt like my chest was going to explode.

I am totally gonna do it again in the Fall!

My time was 1:13:10. Not good but could be worse.

April 19th is the Corporate Cup.

Back to the title line... so the winner... and 1st 12 runners in were from Kenya... and did it in 20 minutes approximatly.

WHAT THE FRICKEN HELL IS THAT?!

I ask you... how is this possible?! Almost 6.4 miles.... in that time.... what were you running from that you have gotten this fast.

I am not a runner. Good-ness... but seeing that score and having the moving camera take your pic is addictive. Stronger, faster, better. I am sure I can do better.

From here we re-commit to the training regimine... also... am doing well with the biking, now i have to take that show on the road... literally.

and now that i CAN swim i have to get back in the pool and ACTUALLY swim.

will work for everything...

I am not a work-a-holic. but i understand how one becomes such a beast.

Yesterday I was called such by the roommate. he is bi-polar. he recently told me so. I don't so much think he gets to judge. Had I known before i moved in, i would not have.

Back to me.

I love what I do... I am getting better at it. I take it with me, because it is not so much filling 8 hours at a time, as it is the next project, the next thing, my thing. I enjoy it.

and when things are not going well in a particular aspect of your life, it is easy to focus on what you can control. what you can do well.

The dream killer is going out tonight. and tomorrow. and asked what i had planned for the weekend lest I should have something he is interested in. We are not dating. I don't know what moment of retardation made me think that was a good idea. I do no. It was lots of other stuff not going well.

I am not going out so much. It is expensive and I have both a budget and goals. DK is not cheap. DK is spoiled. He pisses money away like it is cool. Today he defends with "I like what I like." yes. but he can't take care of anything. He will throw a $2000 suit on the couch. where his cats will sleep on it. and then ask me to pick up his dry cleaning when i get mine... leaving out that he hasn't paid for anything. If he does not have, his parents will give it to him. In a 30 year old man, that is disgusting.

I can discuss only as it relates to me. DK wanted a girlfriend. badly. There was a day that he bought me an outfit from Banana Republic because it was so unlike what I wear to work and he thought it looked nice. And has talked about it ever since. because it is the first time he has ever done it for anyone. Nothing he does or has ever done is without recourse. that weekend his dad won a small portion of the lottery and promised each of the kids some money. Dk asked for a check. got it, and asked me to pay for dinner that night.

I have long known that DK has no room in his world for me in that capacity. He is the party guy friend, who it is good to know to get you into clubs, newer bars and great restaurants. but if he didn't sponge off of his parents, we would and has done it for me. he throws words around like 'get engaged in a year' and 'our kids'... and again i cannot breath. he does not have enough substance for me and I work too hard to throw my money into him.

so tonight, tomorrow, and forever and ever... he will drink, and i will read.

He is vain soul sucking selfish and superficial.

and this only further makes me think that if he was for me... him wanting marriage would seem like a good thing. now it just sounds like a liability.

Where did all the words go?

I promised you an update. my company is going to pay for me to go to law school. It is amazing and spectacular... and a mixed blessing.

said concession comes with a few fixed prices:
1. law school has to be here
2. there is a cap set by the IRS that they cannot exceed (there is a way around that... maybe I'll tell you once I've gotten them to get over this)
3. I have to make at least a B in every class
4. I have to go at least 2 semesters a year
5. I still have to work full-time

mother of god.

So this is how we will make this work.
1. law school will be here (for now, with the soft intention of I will transfer if i decide that is better for me and just take mammoth loans)
2. for now we will take the max
3. oh-gosh... i can't breath. nor will i be able to until i know what I am doing. The girl that works in the Starbux downstairs is about to be a 3-L. I am getting all of her books to start reading this sh*t NOW.
4. Duh. the program I am taking is 11 hours a semester but you still finish in 3 years. better than an evening part time program that takes 4 and a half. plus i will go to summer school. i don't need a life for now. i need to not be poor.
5. and ok. if that is what it takes for now... O.K.

The part that has yet to be mentioned... and it is very very pertinent...

There is nothing in the policy, verbal, or written agreement that promises me to your company for any length of time. i.e. if i pay for 1 semester you owe me 2 years. nope.

On it's face, it would seem like that means they could let me go whenever they want. True. but that was always so. as can i leave at any point in time. and should such a thing happen mid semester... we up the loans and find a clerkship. that is the contingency plan. i know better than not having one.

also, you are asking yourself... why would they pay for law school? if so many people are going... and they have a great in house council... they have their pick of people and only hire attys with 4-7 years of experience... in a nut shell, here it is...

a while ago Shy told me I left 20K on the table b/c I did not negotiate my salary b/c I was so ready to leave JPMorgan Chase. I did some research. That is true. The national average for what I do is 23K more than i make. the state average is ALSO more than I make. I know this. they know i know this. i am told i cannot negotiate salary until august. ok.

I bring up law school and got asked for a justification. i have no idea what i wrote but it convinced my boss, her boss and the COO of my company. so it is like giving me a raise without my business line having to pay for it.

M (my boss) is afraid this might give me less to bargain with in august for more money. No. no. I have met me, and I am no longer the person I was. This is how we will fix that.

I work harder. I am taking sh*t home, I am pulling up the email, and will be getting them to give me a black berry to be more available to you. for now. In April I will start my 6 week construction class. it ends in June, i might so the safety bit too.... which will give me an OSHA 10 certification. which i could give a hoot less about, but on a resume it is growth, it is challenging... and it looks like i am interested in whatever my business/industry does.

i will be more of a techie and get my certifications to teach a few more professional offerings... like project management classes... and Microsoft Project.

By the time we get to August, you will have to pay me what I am worth. If not the whole 23K more... pretty freakin close to it. because before we ask for the raise... the resume will go everywhere.... including the engineering firm down the street.

consider this.

I love what I do. I love the boss I have. I work for a division of a company that is limited in resources... which has turned into a blessing.

I get to touch and learn fantastic things. I get to spend time in training on all IT applications that is relatively new, that i would never have come to on my own.

I have gotten rave reviews from my boss and my boss's boss, which happens to be a sr. vp, on each and every one of my projects. i am an asset. he said so.

now for the bad part... I know my work is good. My boss is grooming and developing me and does not treat me like a secretary nor limit my creativity. My boss's boss knows my stuff is great... but in bigger meetings, my boss's great work is credited to her boss... my great work is attributed to her... and me? I don't exist.

oh.

So this was the job until law school which i vehemently wanted to not be here. The job is here. and my lack being able to express personal statement means i have limited my dream schools... to just a dream. Further, the application process gets expensive and I have taken such a cut by taking the fun job.

Recently I tried to date the Dream killer again. it lasted almost a month. and it is STILL not a good idea. no more boyfriend. why? the things that are wrong are still wrong. i have no indication that it will get better.

I have been known to view a job like a boy... the things that are wrong... money, credit. To get more money, I have to be seen more as an asset, i.e. the sr vp must pay me what i am worth. or it fails to be a good fit.

on to law school. so if i stay here, and choose the cheapest school, what would it matter if i did well. any where else and i am mortgaging my soul. what if my company could pay for it?

today we put that ball in motion. If they pay for it, i will be applying for part time law school, if not then it will be full time.

the decision should come quickly.

it has become what will make me stay or leave. because a huge raise before the formal 'evaluation period' just doesn't happen in a huge corp.

rat bastard.

My Roommate has a profile on MATCH.COM

stay calm. this is not weird. a lot of people do this.

That is not the freaky thing... know where I saw it? on a pop up advertisement of... wouldn't you like to meet this single in your area?

No. No I would not. He is usually right downstairs. and I do NOT want a relationship with him. We already have one. of a financial nature.

ewwwwww.

his pics are really him. but some of the stuff like he works out 1/2 times a week... liar.

He is not 5' 8", that would make him at least my height. which he is not. he's more like 5' 6" ish.

he does not read

diet= meat and potatoes... or microwave pizzas.

and he drinks 1/2 a week?! liar. he gets freaking smashed at every "social outing" oh wow.

he does not live alone... he lives with me!

and what he is looking for... whew!

Oh... and the best part, he is paying for this.

But i cannot judge him, i just made up an email address and dummy profile to see what he had out there.

happy dating, be careful, people lie online!

Chinese Hush Money.

So the Chinese new year was this week. The only know this because I found a tiny red envelope in my leather chair on a random morning. with a note but no signature. some of us got them, but not all of us. the dork in me was trying to figure out who they came from by association.

Boy am I glad I did not assume it was from Monica just because her parents own a Chinese buffet restaurant... boy would I have been embarrassed.... it was not from her. and she did not get one. and i got the distinct pleasure of not sounding like a tool as I faked a conversation about something I had no idea about.

nope, this is me. so of COURSE it came from the staffing manager. I have to give you more there...He is from San Diego (He thinks this makes him hip). His father is Phillipino (that makes him small) and his mother is Indian (that makes him weird). His wife is a caucasian insect professor at LSU who runs marathons (so he thinks we have something in common to discuss). He randomly spoke to me in Japanese for several days... because he assumed I am very cultured. (I AM VERY CULTURED! ish.) He does not so much speak to me... as he speaks AT me.

I am goofy. http://www.trymango.com/ i started learning Japanese because I was embarrassed that I had no Japanese in my repetoire. I can have that whole intro conversation. Anatawa?

back to the money. he printed up this little blurb to go with it... Saying this is the year of the Rat (yay RAT) and how in china little kids got a little red envelope with either $2 or $4 as something to ward off evil, etc. (mine has 2... i didn't open mine, but i coerced someone else into open theirs). M (boss) laughed at me as I described it to her before she got in... "What is it?" she asks.

"It is supposed to ward off evil... and we both got one... maybe we are being called evil?" i much rather prefer to refer to it as my Chinese Hush Money.

and i'm not going to open it or spend it.

and you cannot have it either.

I need a bike.

1st tri is May 10th. ish. i need my own bike. i now have no bike. need a road bike. to ride for 12 miles. after 350 meters swim.

right after i am going to fall on face. please pick me up off the road... before the angry geese get me.

The Most Beautiful Book I Never Read.

Punch line: it is Shalimar the Clown by Salman Rushdie

Back story to follow.

how to start... I am an auditory learner. I know this about myself. The best way for me to remember something is to hear it. If I read it, I can give you the gist... if I hear it, I can give it back to you verbatim. about.

Segue: Rushdie is not my favorite writer. I read him. but I don't particularly LIKE him. I get why he is good, I get that it is an expansion of what I think literally possible to wrap my head around his complex fumbling tumbling cliches with the same soul... I question if he can write women. Truly write women. Write in such a way that makes me flip to the back to check for your picture to make sure that you are a man.

Or write a man that I want to breath into life. I say so in the light of Ondaatje's "In the Skin of a Lion"... i forget his name, but the main hero-guy. I want him. I want to be with him. I want the soul shaking earth-moving lover forever and ever... and one that thinks and loves and speaks like him. but he is a character in a book. and Rushdie has never evoked such a thing in me.

Until...

So Shalimar is book on CD. After I bought both Midnight's Children and the Satanic Verses... I said NO MORE! and then I went to the public library to see what was in the book on CD section. It keeps me mind occupied when I have to stay at my desk and do things like answer 11ty billion emails.

I find Shalimar. I hesitate. I figure if it sucks I give it back immediately. Except it is beautiful. and I will seek it in print to see if I like it as much. I want to tell you what it is I like so much... but I'm still processing.

It has a man that I know. It has a women I've struggled with. and yet smacks of his Ice Queen from Satanic verses... and even she walks with me. Her imagery. the seamless integration of mysticism... whoa! no. i reserve that for Gabriel Garcia Marquez. because even I don't know that to be a quantifiable thing. ugh.

and it truly is... the most beautiful book I've never read.

besos.

Wanna see the Tom Cruise freakshow?

http://gawker.com/5002269/the-cruise-indoctrination-video-scientology-tr

yeah, it's that good.

What would it take to snatch this thing?

Hear me out!

It is not my fault that this is where my mind immediately goes.

I personally blame the plethora of movies like Ocean 11, 12, and 13 that makes it looks so easy. Ok not easy but really fun. Plus, apparently, Brad Pitt shows up like the prize out of a cereal box.

So I now have a roommate. He is nice enough. I am getting things to redecorate my new space. and Dk get dragged along.

He is pouting as we venture to the 3rd linen store to compare quality of bath towels... when he sits right up and says "You have to got to be freakin kidding me!"

That could be about anything.

What it happened to be about yesterday was the 2008 BCS Championship Waterford Coach's trophy. Apparently it is on tour across the entire city (probably New Orleans too... but definitely not the whole state) to the different venues of its sponsors.

Yesterday was the Verizon store on Seigan. It has it's own police escort and tent. The line of people to see it was amazing. I mean wrapped around the building. at 11 in the morning!

I ask if he needs me to pull over so he can get in line. He says "ummm no" and begins a rant of the sorry saps that have never achieved any athletic prowess... and never will... and this is the closest to any form of greatness that these people will ever touch... and blah blah when he ran track for LSU it had the #1 program in the country and more blah blah...

So as we find where we are going, I think to myself... how hard would it be to nab this thing. Not so much that I want it, I don't. Not so much that I would ever do such a thing, I would not.

But I bet it would be worth a lot to the right individual. Especially since tickets to this thing were going for several thousand dollars. For crap seats!

oh and the other thing I had to tell you was... remember the post that ended with the guy who was asking his son about "Great Expectations"? As I am packing up to leave, he introduces himself (I am confused as to why). He is Dr. Caxton Opere. The link takes you to his amazon page for his book.

Yes he is also a published author.

He tells (not asks) me that I know how to create web pages. (I was also doing stuff for work on my laptop) I blink while waiting for the rest of it. He then tell his son that I will create his website for him for free... in exchange of which he will give me personal coaching on my personal relationships for the next 5 years. I thank him for his generous offer and give some excuse of why I have to leave NOW. He is African. Like from the continent... Indian people have a quaint saying of calling someone "fresh off the boat". That was him. and he was pushy and overbearing.

He asks if I know who he is... I say no. He is still holding on to my hand telling me about his book and how he was divorced and he never will be again and how he can make sure i choose well and am never divorced. Based on his explanation of his work I ask if he knows beyond a shadow of a doubt that he has a "successful marriage and he nor his wife will NEVER file for divorce" he chuckles and affirms. Ok crazy... let's get ready for the summation.

I don't care how much of an expert you are, never say never, bubba. NEVER. plus his delivery made me want to jump out of my skin. But I'm not saying there is not some validity to his book. I haven't looked at it, I don't know. What I do know is if the success of this book is based on this man selling it/being attached to it... to where you see him... it will not do so well.

He reiterates his offer... 5 whole years of being able to call this man on his personal cell phone! So exciting! So generous of an offer! Such a crock of B.S. !

He tries to convince me one more time by telling me his sage advice to some woman who had marital problems. Know what it was? Victoria's Secret. That was it.

I tell him I have his card and I will call him when I've decided to accept his offer.

Translation: He should be getting that call about quarter to never.

My Opinion Matters!

... and gosh-darnit people like me.

hee hee.

Ok, so my newest favorite brain-cell numbing activities are... drum roll please.....

responding to Yahoo Answers and the Big Debate.

Not to say that I have time for it, because I assure you that I came upon this while I was hard at work... or procrastinating about work... which is so close to working, it's scary.

I love these things. and here is why... the Big Debate on msn is great because I listen to a retardo debate about celebrities I don't care about.... and then I give my opinion by voting on some retardo aspect of their lives or careers (Britney is sooo over!).

Because with out my little click msn might cease to be.

Yahoo Answers. So I came about this by google searching something... and apparently someone had asked my exact question at Yahoo Answers (cosmic, I know!)... and people responded. and somewhere else on the page was an open question that caught my attention... and that was all she wrote...

So let me tell you why this is still amusing... These things are about as life changing as day time television. But honestly some of the questions these people are asking of strangers is AWESOME! (yes JD... truly awesome) but more in the dumbfounded... were you dropped on you head when you were little kind of way.

One girl asked why she had no REAL friends. My answer is below because I feel the need to answer stupidity that feels like a brain freeze... why would you ask such a question to a bunch of strangers... no one on this page is in a position to answer that. maybe you should start there...

maybe harsh (I got a thumbs down for that... i may seek therapy) and I respect that I am goofy for both reading and responding... and that this is now a very fun thing to do.

Some one else asked if people purposely offend in their answers... Me? honestly no. I'm giving you my opinion. This is America and Sesame Street says there is no one as unique and wonderful as me.

Ahhh but the argument could be made that such is the same with blogging... we share ourselves and let people comment. I still think it different, at least if you make your way through some of this you have a sense of me... and besides we all know it takes nothing at all for us to have an opinion about something.

So go ahead people, take advantage of the positive reinforcement of how important, necessary and powerful you are. but please don't let this be the only place you feel so.

How 'bout them tigers?