"If something should happen to me, please remove my porn collection before my mom gets there"

This is one of the many things I am to remember while the Dream Killer is out of town.

And that is the kind of good friend I am... Should something happen to him, the Overachiever and I would both make a mad dash and rip up DK's house to make sure his collection was properly disposed of.... the things I do for you people. and do you appreciate it? NO.

So that boy is in DC until Tuesday. I am house sitting. He suggests I put Blanca in the shop on Tuesday or Wednesday so I can use the big Jeep and not have to rent a car. He tells me this is going to be ok. That all of the pieces will be put back together and I didn't do anything wrong so stop hyper ventalating. He even remembered to call when he got there... to say that he got there.

and as I leave message thanking him for remembering to check in (which only took 6 years to achieve) I further come to a sort of realization. I do love him. Granted not IN LOVE and no I don't want a relationship with him. and physically there is no desire to do more than hug him. .. until his little peanut head pops off. But really... as a person, as my friend. I have big hearts for the nemesis know as the Dream Killer.

I know this because when he asks me what I want him to bring me... I say "don't die". He says... "Well that was my general plan anyway. I usually have better vacations when I go somewhere and I don't die." He won't remember to buy me a shirt or something. He is just not that kind of considerate person. But it is true that this is all I want. and I know I love him because when he goes away my chest closes and the little voice in my head says "what if something happens to him? what will we do? who will rub my calves when I hurt?"

It doesn't matter if he is in my city and we don't talk for a month. I know where he is and that he's mostly ok.

I laugh as I stop by yesterday and there is a note on the coffee table that says "See! I cleaned up... so maybe you will want to stay a while... I bought Italian ices in the freezer".

My big stupid stupid head.