Sometimes... you just need a cookie.

Yesterday I had a biscuit and coffee for breakfast. Steamed rice, grilled fish, and cabbage for lunch (it was fantastic even if it didn't sound so). My snack turned into a KitKat that made me sick.

Right before the gym I was munchie... but leery as the KitKat made me sick. It was rainy and cold so I made cocoa... and saw a sub-par cookie in the vending machine. I got the cookie and heated it up... and it was wonderful. I thought it might have been too soon before the gym to eat anything else... but no. How does this tie into yesterday?

Dream-Killer has a dad worth knowing. He once offered a letter of recommendation to law school and I have yet to take him up on it. Yesterday DK texts me that to do so may be embarrassing for me. I ask why and he says that he told his dad about Monday's blow-up and it was his dad that suggested that DK try to talk to me again. This bit of insight was given with the undertone that I was presented in a very crazy light and it would be best for me to tuck my tail. Ok.

The way I see it... 1. Having the letter in the 1st place would have been the result of what the son thought of me, not the dad (presumably). and 2. if it is an extension of the son and not the dad, I truly shouldn't have it. 3. the same words that had the potential to build me up, have smacked me so many times I should not be surprised.

It was a stupid card trick for DK to pull... because he now has none left. I have no reason to ever ever speak to him again. Not to say the only reason we were still friends was because of that letter, that's bull. But he crossed a line that has the potential to sully me to the few positives I could hold.

Fast forward to intense workout. I left right after with out the usual pleasantries or conversations. David's bunny called me on way home to check on me. She expressed concern. I didn't want to talk about it, and she understood. And had she not been so understanding I wouldn't have talked about it. But it kind of came to a head and spilled out.

She re-iterates how much DK is not for me, and what a jerk he is to pick a fight when my head is stuck in the LSAT. She expresses her faith that I will do well in life no matter what. And this situation only serves to sift the positives from the negative. She is right. She tells me that right now there is no hurt, no pain, no I-wish-you were different. There is only, I am going to get into a great law school with or without you and I am sorry you do not have the capacity to want to help.

Lastly she says... I am still going to ask for that letter. Humble greatness that the Sr. is says that he would not say no based on jr. opinion. He knows me. He knows my work and has seen me struggle. If there is a no to be had, he will have to say it to me.

this goes up because I needed it today. Maybe you did to. and maybe we will have a proper tea one cold day and this will all be funny. With almond cookies even. :)